Two of the most difficult things that we can learn to do socially is to prevent a bad date, or to then have to recover from a bad date. Obviously, it is best to try to avoid a bad date in the first place whenever possible. Regardless of how hard we might try, bad dates are inevitable. Still, there are a number of outstanding tips and ideas that we can implement to mitigate our chances of having the date from hell. On those occasions when we do have a bad date, there are also plenty of ideas to recover and get back on the dating scene in no time.
Preventing bad dates
Look for compatible dating partners.
As simplistic as this may sound, it is one of the most difficult aspects of our dating lives. Certainly it requires an ability to look within oneself and find that special passion that we find important. It also requires hanging out and surrounding yourself with like-minded individuals. Like they say…” If you want to meet a church woman, then you need to go to church.”
Avoid dating someone “just to be nice” or because a friend asked you to.
One of the most common dating mistakes that people make involves dating someone so they do not hurt their feelings. While they may not hurt their feelings right away, they will eventually if they are not their type. It is much better to do so up front than to wait until they are crazy over you.
Avoid controversial subjects at first.
While out on the first or second date, it is rarely a good idea to take on controversial subjects as topics of conversation. Generally speaking, politics and religion are the first topics to avoid. While certainly you can get this conversation out of the way early, it can lead to a much higher ratio of bad to good dates. Consider yourself warned.
Go on active dates that have you moving around.
Active dates are much better because they fill in uncomfortable quiet moments. If you are moving around on your date, then you are much less likely to find yourself in these awkward moments. Once you feel comfortable with the date, then you can always move to a more stationary setting.
Consider going on the first date as a group.
There is a reason why first dates are extremely popular as a group. This reason is because bad dates become much less uncomfortable when you have someone else there to support you. If you are uncertain about an upcoming date, call up a buddy and have them tag along with a date of their own.
Recovering from a bad date
Understand that bad dates happen to everyone.
No matter how wonderful of a person you may be, you will eventually have a stinker date on your social resume. They happen to even the most popular and desirable people in the world. Do not let it get you down for one moment and for goodness sake, don’t let it affect your self-esteem.
Reassess the date after having a night to sleep on it.
When you go back over the date in your mind, always give yourself a good night’s sleep before hand. When you look at a bad date under the light of day, it sometimes appears much better than it did the night before. While it is important to assess the date and figure out what went wrong if you can, it is certainly not something that you should obsess over.
Laugh about really horrible dates.
Having a sense of humor about a bad date is really the best medicine. Laugh it off with a few friends over drinks.
Give yourself some recovery time before dating again.
If you feel like heading out on another date right away, by all means you should do so. Make sure, however, that you are not in a poor state of mind before the date. Going on a date too quickly after a bad date can lead to even more dating disasters.
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